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Big Toes and Fingers

by Kafkadiva

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Patrick Talbot
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Patrick Talbot A fun debut album which displays a range of style and mature songwriting that can't help win the listeners. From laid back to gritty, but mostly fun and clever, with musicianship right up there with the best, this one is highly recommended! Favorite track: Maybe.
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1.
Mr Gorgeous 02:26
Well, you’re the guy With the perfect style You’ve got the perfect body And the perfect face Freak of nature Created perfection And you took your place In the human race When I met you I joined the queue One look into those eyes And I was tantalised! Soon to learn When it came to ‘my turn’ And your ego crept out So I checked out... Mr lover, I’m just one of a few Who’d like to drop you down By a peg or two! Cos you’re an arrogant son of a gun, That’s true And if I see you never Well it’ll be too soon! I guess this song Is a little strong And if you think it’s unfair Well, I don’t care Even if you knew It was written ‘bout you Well it wouldn’t hurt a bit Cos your skin’s so goddamned thick Mr lover, I’m just one of a few Who’d like to drop you down By a peg or two! Cos you’re an arrogant son of a gun, That’s true And if I see you never Well it’ll be too soon! “She worships the ground that I walk on” That’s what you said... “I’m gonna make you beg” That’s what you said! © Louise Wilson
2.
Breathe 03:26
Now that the crisis has passed I feel there is nowhere else to go but up I’m sure that I won’t be here again I won’t be here again Breathing is the easiest thing (Provided there’s air for you to breathe, yeah) Breathing is the easiest things So, breathe in! I know we can do it, I’m sure we can do it We just got to Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I know we can do it, I’m sure we can do it We got to Yeah! Flow like the water Feel as it washes over Flow like the water Feel it washing over I know we can do it, I’m sure we can do it We just got to Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I know we can do it, I’m sure we can do it We got to Yeah! © Louise Wilson
3.
Quagmire 03:04
You’ve got me upside down Back-to-front And generally sideways You’ve spun me round so much I don’t know which way I’m facing these days I’m on roller-coaster ride That I can’t get off, I’ve tried It seems I’ve dismally failed In your perception of perfection And now I’ve disappeared inside And I’ve done it for my own protection You want to keep me guessing Coz it might teach me a lesson I’m in a quagmire Is that it for me? I’m in a quagmire Will I ever be free? I’m in quagmire And the forecast is dire Why do you break me And twist me and hurt me Until I give in? Why do you smash me to pieces To satisfy your every whim? Is it to see if I sink or I swim? I’ve hopped from left foot to right foot And jumped through hoops for you! Don’t know my arse from my elbow As it turns out, neither do you! I’m in a quagmire And the forecast is dire I’m in a quagmire Is that it for me? I’m in a quagmire Will I ever be free? I’m in quagmire And the forecast is dire © Louise Wilson
4.
Carry Me 04:48
I don’t want to talk I don’t want to try I don’t have the inclination And I don’t have the time I don’t want to face up And I don’t want to learn I just want to wake up To find I’ve missed my turn! I want it all easy So won’t you carry me? Oh, won’t you carry me? I don’t want to work And I don’t want to give I don’t want to give I don’t want the trouble I just want to live! I want it all easy So won’t you carry me? Oh, won’t you carry me? Give me what’s easy Give me what’s easy Won’t you pick me up Won’t you pick me up And carry me please? Give me what’s easy Give me what’s easy Won’t you pick me up Won’t you pick me up And carry me please? I want it all easy! So won’t you carry me? Oh, won’t you carry me? I don’t want to hurry I don’t want to change I don’t want to worry And I don’t to act my age, no! I want it all easy So won’t you carry me? Oh, won’t you carry me? Give me what’s easy Give me what’s easy Won’t you pick me up Won’t you pick me up And carry me please? Give me what’s easy Give me what’s easy Won’t you pick me up Won’t you pick me up And carry me please? I want it all easy! So won’t you carry me? Oh, won’t you carry me? © Louise Wilson
5.
Anyhow 03:13
Words flow from my fingertips More easily than from my lips Anyhow, it doesn’t matter now Wounded hearts and stranded minds Bring worried heads and troubled times Anyhow, it doesn’t matter now. Always lonely Always lonely Rigid rules, so tightly bound Cause freedom craved, so freedom found Anyhow, it doesn’t matter now I’m glad you showed me the true you I’m glad you acted cold and cruel I’m glad you made me look a fool I’m glad you lost your cool I’m glad you showed your form before I invested any more Close the door To convince or to deceive? Taken in or just naïve? It doesn’t matter now I’m glad you showed me the true you I’m glad you acted cold and cruel I’m glad you made me look a fool I’m glad you lost your cool I’m glad you showed your form before I invested any more Close the door Now I leave it all behind Put the hurt out of my mind Anyhow, it doesn’t matter now Always lonely Always © Louise Wilson
6.
Maybe 03:14
One day - maybe When I’m less inept I might be worthy Of your respect One day – maybe You’ll be a little less harsh You might allow me To kiss your arse Well I can’t even dream Of coming close to you I’m in a lesser league And second best won’t do Dare I even muse? Let alone peruse That I’ll be fit for shit On your shoes? Till then, I’ll be moping Saying prayers and hoping That your arms will open And you’ll come back Since your cold rejection My life has lacked direction And I’ve pined for your affection One day - maybe I’ll be as cool as you And I’ll be able To do the things you do One day - maybe I’ll be a little less harsh I might allow you To kiss my arse Till then, I’ll be moping Saying prayers and hoping That your arms will open And you’ll come back Since your cold rejection My life has lacked direction And I’ve pined for your affection © Louise Wilson
7.
She is a simple girl The average, ordinary, normal kind Wishing for nothing But an average, ordinary kind of life Her flat is…average A kind of ordinary flat Where she lives, sensibly (Not expensively) With her boyfriend and her cat She was a good child She never caused an ounce of strife (Never wild) She aspires to be a wife She’s got a job It’s nice and normal (nine to five) She never realised That there was any more to life Sally Average, baby machine It’s not my place to say this But you’re living in a daydream Sally Average, where have you been? Now is the time for you to Open your mind… On a Monday She goes to shop for her and him Then on a Tuesday, its aerobics ‘Cause she must stay nice and slim On a Wednesday it’s his turn And he’s off down the gym Then ‘til Sunday - boring! Sally Average, baby machine It’s not my place to say this But there’s more to life than babies Sally Average, where have you been? Now is the time for you to Open your mind… Let’s get married Plan the day! (Even though it’s years away) Coffee table, fondue set Dinner service, private jet Microwave and pastry maker Kenwood coffee percolator Married life is fun and laughter You’ll live happily ever after Sally Average, baby machine It’s not my place to say this But you’re living in a daydream Sally Average, where have you been? Now is the time for you to Open your mind… © Louise Wilson
8.
Hypnodub 04:29
9.
Decipher 02:59
I hate this time together I wish it didn’t bother me But, it does And when you’re not here There’s a different atmosphere I hate your stormy temper I wish it didn’t bother me But, it does And when you’re not around I feel safe and sound Doo do do, oh oh oh Ooo, yeah yeah yeah I hate this indecision I wish it didn’t bother me But, it does And when the light goes out I’m sorry for how it turned out. Doo do do, oh oh oh Ooo, yeah yeah yeah © Louise Wilson
10.
Joe 90 03:48
This guy I know Well, he loves to be rich Without working every day God sends He’s got a lot of money And he drives a nice car But he doesn’t have many friends He’s got a mobile phone It’s like his little black book Full of girlie’s names He never got to…phone up! (Well, if you know what I mean) He’s a jumped up cad With a bachelor pad.. But he’s bad... This guy I know He’s as fit as can be He likes to keep himself in shape He’s not good looking And he’s really small I guess he has to compensate He eats exotic fruits He wears Armani suits He gets as many ‘beauts’ As his gold card can buy... (I’ll give you one guess why, yeah) He’s an arrogant git And a devious little shhh.. But that’s it! © Louise Wilson
11.
Girl On Top 03:36
She’s the woman With the world at her feet Seems like she’s ten feet high Her face is amazing And her legs are so long She could conquer the world in one stride! The press like it best When she’s not dressed to impress So it pays her to look just right She’s learnt to be friends With the man behind the lens So he portrays her in her very best light If there’s one thing That she knows It’s that she’s beautiful And whatever you might say She’s on top! Sex appeal seals a lucrative deal She just names her price So now she’s got it made Got a few million saved Should have the best For the rest of her life If there’s one thing That she knows It’s that she’s beautiful And whatever you might say She’s on top! © Louise Wilson
12.
Want to climb in your head Want to curl right up inside you Want to spend my time beside you But it feels like I’m already there Feels like I’m already there Want to give my heart Want to pour it all out to you Want to share my whole self with you But it feels like I’m already there Feels like I’m already there And I’ve lost my voice It’s like I have no choice It’s like there’s nothing I can do Except for be in love with you There’s nothing I can do Want to lie in you in your arms Just hold me close forever I know we’re safe together But it feels like I’m already there Feels like I’m already there And I’ve lost my voice It’s like I have no choice It’s like there’s nothing I can do Except for be in love with you There’s nothing I can do Lost my voice It’s like I have no choice And there’s nothing I can do © Louise Wilson

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Diverse in style yet unmistakable in sound, this album comprises twelve refreshingly original tracks that mingle edgy, riffy rock with satire and sensitivity.

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released November 1, 2010

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Kafkadiva Leicester, UK

Kafkadiva is a female-fronted three-piece whose genre is 'quirky & satirical bluesy-rock- pop'.

With influences ranging from Ian Dury & the Blockheads, Cream & Free to Portishead & Alanis Morissette, Kafkadiva present a truly unique sound which appeals to a diverse audience.

Their songs express deep sensitivity & romance as well as raw, edgy rock demonstrating both versatility and ability.
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